Broke the lucky streak

We've gone three months without a veterinary emergency. Broke that record this week. Dang. We were shooting for 6 months this time, fell short by half. 

DH got home and made the call. You know the one. 

"Honey? I think Cody ate something."

Crap. "Like what?"

"Well......"

Double crap. Probably the fridge this time. "Oh just tell me."

"8 english muffins plus the packaging. Plastic, cardboard and all."

I'm ashamed to write what went on in my head after that statement. 

"That's not too bad. I'll call the vet anyway."

That's right. In my house, 8 english muffins plus the packaging qualifies as not bad. 

Kids should be a breeze.

Snow, Driveways, Puppies and other lovely things....

Highlights from my month in a deep dark hole.....

1. It snowed today. 2 inches. Which is nothing compared to the 36 inches that South Dakota got. Yeah that's right it's November 7th. Love MN. 

2. Cody discovered where we keep all of the high value items (i.e. chocolate, other bad for him things) and learned how to open the child safety lock and drawer and ate them. He survived. Little turd.

3. One of my rescue groups busted a puppy mill and we took in a 2nd foster dog for a grand total of 3 dogs. Nevermind that this little sweetheart had never seen doors, stairs or anything else of a similar nature. 

4. Above dog was pregnant. Oh boy.

5. Pregnant dog now a false alarm. Rollercoaster anyone?

6. Cowgirl/Sweets suddenly started peeing EVERYWHERE. Turns out she has a raging bladder infection. Cleared that up much to my carpet's relief. 

7. Came home from work one day to find my driveway missing. Yup you heard it. It was MISSING! Called the city. Turns out that there was a problem with the utilities and they had to fix it and by doing so took out my driveway. No big deal ma'am. Oh you're right sir, it's just my DRIVEWAY! 

8. Came home a week later and I had a new driveway. Nice in the end, but would a phone call have hurt? I don't think so.

Last but not least, Cowgirl is getting adopted this Saturday! Yipee! I'll do a photo montage later. Because I'm cool (or cheesy pick your adjective) that way. 

The good thing about falling into a black hole for a month? I now have a month of wicked stories to share with you. Stay tuned.

Couldn't have said it better myself....

Got an email from my step-mom and had to post this. I couldn't have said it better myself.

Dear Dogs - 

The dishes with the paw prints are yours and contain your food. The other dishes are mine and contain my food. Please note, placing a paw print in the middle of my plate and food does not stake a claim for it becoming your food and dish, nor do I find that aesthetically pleasing in the slightest. 

The stairway was not designed by NASCAR and is not a racetrack. Beating me to the bottom is not the object. Tripping me doesn't help because I fall faster than you can run.

 I cannot buy anythign bigger than a king sized bed. I am very sorry about this. Do not think I will continue sleeping on the couch to ensure your comfort. Dogs and cats can actually curl up in a ball when they sleep. It is not necessary to sleep perpendicular to each other stretched out to the fullest extent possible. I also know that sticking tails straight out and having tongues hanging out the other end to maximize space is nothing but sarcasm. 

For the last time, there is no secret exit from the bathroom. If by some miracle I beat you there and manage to get the door shut, it is not necessary to claw, whine, meow, and try to turn the knob or get your paw under the edge and try to pull the door open. I must exit through the same door I entered. Also, I have been using the bathroom for years -- canine or feline attendance is not required. 

The proper order is to kiss me, then go smell the other dog or cat's butt. I cannot stress this enough!

To pacify you, my dear pets, I have posted the following message on our front door:

To all non-pet owners who visit and like to complain about our pets:

1. They live here. You don't.

2. If you don't want hair on your clothes, stay off the furniture. That's why they call it 'fur"niture.

3. I like my pets a lot better than I like most people

4. To you they are an animal. To me, they are adopted sons/daughters who are short, hairy, and walk on all fours and don't speak clearly.

I'm proud....

I'm proud to be the family that everyone refers to as "the dog family" on my block.

I'm proud to be a mom to two fuzzy kids.

I'm proud of the fact that I have more dog beds in my house than I do floor space.

I'm proud that most of my conversations revolve around dogs or dog behaviors or something related.

I'm proud of the fact that my dog can get on the counters. 

I'm proud that I consider myself a mom even though I have no bi-peds. Who cares? I still clean up vomit and poo and wake up at all hours of the night for them. Only difference is my kids stay at the age of 4 for about 10 years. 

I'm proud that I carry on perfectly reasonable conversations with my dogs. 

I'm proud that I am fiercely loyal to their nutritional needs and will homecook their meals if necessary. 

I'm proud that I foster and give away a piece of my heart with each dog. 

I'm proud to have dog hair all over my house. It adds character. 

Most of all I'm proud to a DOGGY MAMA! Without fuzzy creatures in my life, who knows where I'd be?