Wednesday, September 24, 2008

Couldn't have said it better myself....

Got an email from my step-mom and had to post this. I couldn't have said it better myself.

Dear Dogs - 

The dishes with the paw prints are yours and contain your food. The other dishes are mine and contain my food. Please note, placing a paw print in the middle of my plate and food does not stake a claim for it becoming your food and dish, nor do I find that aesthetically pleasing in the slightest. 

The stairway was not designed by NASCAR and is not a racetrack. Beating me to the bottom is not the object. Tripping me doesn't help because I fall faster than you can run.

 I cannot buy anythign bigger than a king sized bed. I am very sorry about this. Do not think I will continue sleeping on the couch to ensure your comfort. Dogs and cats can actually curl up in a ball when they sleep. It is not necessary to sleep perpendicular to each other stretched out to the fullest extent possible. I also know that sticking tails straight out and having tongues hanging out the other end to maximize space is nothing but sarcasm. 

For the last time, there is no secret exit from the bathroom. If by some miracle I beat you there and manage to get the door shut, it is not necessary to claw, whine, meow, and try to turn the knob or get your paw under the edge and try to pull the door open. I must exit through the same door I entered. Also, I have been using the bathroom for years -- canine or feline attendance is not required. 

The proper order is to kiss me, then go smell the other dog or cat's butt. I cannot stress this enough!

To pacify you, my dear pets, I have posted the following message on our front door:

To all non-pet owners who visit and like to complain about our pets:
1. They live here. You don't.

2. If you don't want hair on your clothes, stay off the furniture. That's why they call it 'fur"niture.

3. I like my pets a lot better than I like most people

4. To you they are an animal. To me, they are adopted sons/daughters who are short, hairy, and walk on all fours and don't speak clearly.

Tuesday, September 23, 2008

Big Black Dogs Video

Check it out. This is an awesome video about the plight of Big Black Dogs in our society. Pass on the info to everyone. Be someone. Save a life.

Sunday, September 21, 2008

I'm proud....

I'm proud to be the family that everyone refers to as "the dog family" on my block.

I'm proud to be a mom to two fuzzy kids.

I'm proud of the fact that I have more dog beds in my house than I do floor space.

I'm proud that most of my conversations revolve around dogs or dog behaviors or something related.

I'm proud of the fact that my dog can get on the counters. 

I'm proud that I consider myself a mom even though I have no bi-peds. Who cares? I still clean up vomit and poo and wake up at all hours of the night for them. Only difference is my kids stay at the age of 4 for about 10 years. 

I'm proud that I carry on perfectly reasonable conversations with my dogs. 

I'm proud that I am fiercely loyal to their nutritional needs and will homecook their meals if necessary. 

I'm proud that I foster and give away a piece of my heart with each dog. 

I'm proud to have dog hair all over my house. It adds character. 

Most of all I'm proud to a DOGGY MAMA! Without fuzzy creatures in my life, who knows where I'd be? 

Wednesday, September 17, 2008

Rude Awakening

You know it's time to mow your lawn when your dogs refuse to go in the backyard to do their business....

Maybe I should get on that.

Sunday, September 14, 2008

Sharing hard to do

I know that there are plenty of people out there who have two or more dogs and do just fine with it. I in fact grew up with two dogs. For some reason I have such a hard time with it. Not with the care and the mess and all that stuff. The more the merrier as far as I'm concerned. I have a case of the guilts. A big fat case of the guilts. I always feel like I'm giving love to one more than the other or giving more treats to one. It doesn't help that Cody knows how to play me like a fiddle. I swear that dog knows how to make his eyes look mopey. Scientists say it's impossible. I say HAH! Try living with a spoiled dog. I know it's stupid, but sometimes I feel like I'm giving Cody the shaft for my fosters or vice versa. DH thinks I'm ridiculous and that I'm "projecting." Maybe. Or maybe not. Cody is just so emotionally attached to me and is emotional period. One wrong move and he can be thrown into an emotional fit sometimes. I'd really rather not have to send my dog to the therapist's couch. It's enough that I end up there. They'd REALLY think I was crazy if I started sending my dog too. Balancing the love for more than one dog leaves me in awe of people like Patience who has 9. 9! Now that's courage.

Doesn't get much better than this...

Cool rainy day, tucked away in my office with a glass of ice tea with a dog on either side keeping my toes warm. 

Doesn't get much better than this does it?

Friday, September 12, 2008

"On the count of 3, fling the poo!"

Above quote courtesy of my husband. 

So we are out walking the dogs last night in the dark (because here in the MN it now gets dark at 7, boo) and this car turns the corner behind us. Not a big deal. Well then it slows waaaaay down and pulls to the side of the road and starts to creep right behind us. For a half a block. All of a sudden my big hulking teddy bear of a husband leans over to me and goes, "On the count of three, fling the poo!" (Both dogs had left us "gifts" earlier in the walk.) Needless to say I couldn't keep a straight face and burst out laughing. He was totally serious. The car ended up to be someone looking for on-street parking. I just kept imagining the guy's surprise if twin bags of poo fell on his windshield. 

Sunday, September 7, 2008

Is that a dog in your pants or are you just happy to see me?

The furkids and I made a trek to the dog park yesterday and I saw by far the funniest thing I have seen in a long time. 
There is this annoying dog named Buddy who frequents the park. I think he's a Basenji, but not sure. He is super smart, but terribly spoiled and if you try to get him to leave you alone he growls and snaps. Awesome. 
So this woman enters the dog park, obviously a newbie. She has treats in her pocket, which everyone who is a regular knows is not a good idea. You get 20 furry friends instantly. But I cut her some slack because she's new and it happens. Buddy starts climbing on the picnic table and trying to get in her pants, literally. Then he tries to climb into her open jumbo slurpee cup. That's right I said into. I pushed him off the table for her (he won't growl at me because I spanked him once, now he knows better) and thought all was well. I went back to throwing the ball for the obsessive one and all of sudden I hear this SHRIEK. I turn around and Buddy has jumped into her pocket (she had cargo shorts on) and is eating the treats out of her pocket. Funniest thing I have seen in forever. She starts jumping around with Buddy in her pocket and Buddy is just munching away in her shorts, no big deal. 

Best part? Buddy's owner just watched from across the park and laughed. 

Wednesday, September 3, 2008

A 4 day weekend - in bullets

A weekend in bullets

  • I walked outside of my house on Saturday to find my beloved dog sitting in the bucket of a construction bobcat. What possessed him to crawl into the construction equipment in my front yard? Lord only knows.  
  • I had my entire front yard ripped to shreds by construction equipment. I now live in a giant mudhole.
  • I found my foster dog lying in the bottom of a dumpster. Why? Naturally she was hot and decided the best possible place to hang out was in the bottom of a steel dumpster. Naturally.
  • Cody and I and my mom got caught in a free-falling elevator on a hill with a 200 foot drop at a 60 degree angle. An outside elevator mind you. I don't think I have ever hugged my dog harder in my life. 
  • Went to the MN State Fair. Ate my way through. 
  • Tore the roof off my basement on accident. Whoops.
  • Put said roof back on my basement.
  • Went to the cabin and went swimming. In the process discovered that Cowgirl hates water. HATES water.
  • Changed Cowgirl's name to Sweets. Not real original, but you have to admit it is WAY better than Cowgirl. Besides, she can't hear it. 
  • Drove a Bobcat on a busy street in Minneapolis. Second only to free-falling elevator in terms of scary.
  • Hit my husband for breaking the mosaic planter in our front yard that was used in our wedding. Twice.
  • Slept for days.

On another note, thoughts on the whole Sarah Palin sort-of but not really scandal? Gotta admit it's got me conflicted.