Crazy header - updated

I realize that my header is going a little bit insane at the moment. Unfortunately my patience/tolerance for Blogger's shenanigans has expired. I'm going to bed before I do something stupid. I'll fix it tomorrow.

**Update** I fixed it to the best of my ability. I may still through some more photos in there. Give me feedback and let me know what (and how) to change. 

I have a snotty dog....

It's true. My dog is a snot. More specifically he is a toy snot. Of epic proportions. I have never met a dog with more toys in my life. That's what happens when you have 3 sets of grandparents who all have their own separate christmases. Multiple that by six aunts and uncles and the toys abound. (Not to mention that his sweet innocent mother may or may not have an obsession with pet stores...) He's got everything money can buy dog-wise and what does he do? He turns his nose up at everything but the really soft and squishy ones that sound like they are being tortured as the squeaker runs out of air. I cannot even tell you how many trainers/vets/behaviorists have told me to get big tough plastic chewy toys to cut down on his destructive behaviors. They look at me like I'm the idiot because I've been suffering through these vet bills and chaotic life needlessly. Then I mutter the words, "he doesn't like tough toys." They look shocked, stunned even. What dog doesn't like Kongs? Mine. Mine doesn't. Believe me folks, if he liked Kongs or any other chew toy that would cut down on the chaos that is my life, I would have them. All of them. I would probably even get a separate toy box in homage to them. But alas, it's not to be. Why? 

Because my dog is a snot.

Random Headline of the week

I know I haven't written anything original in a week or something atrocious like that, but I found this headline and had to post it. I'll dazzle you with my sparkling wit tonight or maybe tomorrow or maybe when my life stops spinning out of control. I'll get back to you on that.

Animal Shelter euthanizes wrong dog

Seriously?? Do you know how PISSED I would be if someone euthanized Cody because they misread his handwritten name card?? Hell hath no fury like a Doggy Mama protecting her young. Dang.

Just a Girl....and her dogs

My girl over at Just a Girl...and her dogs is having a hard time. Pop on over and say something encouraging. I know if that happened to me, the next post you'd get would be from jail. But I think she's maybe just a better person than me. It happens. 

Big Boy Jack

We've got a new man in town. I know that I've said that I will blog about this big hunk like 4 times now. Well here it is. 

Jack is our 3ish years old black lab from IA. Just in case you do live under a rock, IA has had severe flooding the last week or so and over 2000 animals have been abandoned across Eastern IA. Big Jack was a stray in a shelter that was flooded and they were forced to euthanize their animals. So Big Jack got to go for a

 boat ride and car ride and came to hang out with us. (Thanks Kim. C for saving this big lug!) 

He and Cody were at odds for awhile but now they just like to play and wrestle uncontrollably. Of course with my weakness for black labs I wanted to keep him, but DH doesn't share the same sentiment. But in the long ru

n that's probably ok. Big Jack is the sweetest, most cuddliest doof that I have ever met. DH calls him a throw rug because he will just toss all 4 legs out on both sides and pass out in the middle of the floor. He did come with two giant ear i

nfections and two water-born diseases from hanging in the flood waters, but those are about his only faults. Aside from being able to climb my 5 foot chain link fence. That story deserves its own post though. Without further adieu....Big Jack!

So happy to be in a home!

If you look closely you can see Cody's foot on the left...

The Dump and Run

Ok, so I'm sure everyone is guilty of it at one point or another....

You decide to take your dog for a walk and he just pooped so you don't bring a bag. Or you are on a car ride and decide to take an impromptu frolic in a park. 

Then it happens. Your dog starts to do the weird squat face. (Or in Cody's case, the squat walk) Here it comes. Crap (literally and figuratively.) Now what are you supposed to do? You have no bag and your dog just crapped all over the park/sidewalk/grass/someone's yard. 

My modus operadi? I look around nonchalantly to make sure there aren't too many witnesses and then casually walk away hoping to not draw any attention to myself. In other words I do what the DH has termed "The Dump and Run." I always feel so guilty about it too, like I am the one contributing to the bad rap that dogs get in the city. But what alternative do I have? I may love my dog but I draw the line at using my hands. Gross. 

Last weekend my foster Jack and I were on a walk with my friend S when Jack (who just pooped like 10 minutes before at my house) decided now was the time. Of course no bag and we're walking around the BUSIEST lake in the MN. Great. So we nonchalantly looked around and casually walked away. Only to notice that the spot he had chosen to pop a squat was right in front of the sign that said, "Be responsible. Leash and pick up after your pet." Oh the irony. 

Happy Birthday little man!

My Codyman turned 4 yesterday! We had a little birthday party yesterday with him and his 2 "cousins". It was hilarious. DH thought I was crazy, but eh who cares about him anyway? Cody's daycare (that's right, my dog totally goes to daycare) threw him a little party with cake and everything. Like the good overachieving suburban mom that I am I brought doggy treats for everyone. Laugh all you want, but we'll see who's the more popular mom at the end of the day!! 

Moooooommmmm!! This hat is stupid....

It's my BIRTHDAY!!

Cody's cousin Sugar trying to get her hat off her head

Overall the birthday was pretty fun. Technically the 11th isn't his birthday (we think) he was a rescue so birth date unknown. But June 11th is the day we got him, so we celebrate Gotcha Day at our house. 

We have a new foster dog, pics to follow....

Eating with your dog in MN?? Who knew?

Apparently in the MN it is against the law to eat outside on a restaurant patio with your dog. Judging from how many times Cody and I have met friends at Noodles in Uptown for lunch, I can tell you that I had NO idea that it was even an issue. Well now my sources say that a bill has been proposed for this session to make it legal. (I won't even go into how we're wasting our time debating the legalities of whether or not we can eat with our dogs while there are tens of thousands of dogs dying and suffering abuse in breeding facilities all over this state.) 

So I popped over to Pet Central and holy crap. Talk about the raging debate going on. I think my favorite is the person who said that she would rather eat next to a dog than the tons of badly behaved kids out there. I raise my glass in toast to you random commenter. 

As long as your dog is well-behaved then why the big deal? Cody lays underneath the table quietly, most of the time so quietly that people don't even know that he is there. I know people are going to say, "But people like you and your dog are the minority!!!" Then give waiters and managers the power to say, "Get out of my restaurant!" 

Cody and I have been to a few all dog events at a bar here in town and we have never had a problem with the 50+ dogs that show up. 

Bottom line? Let's all eat in peace and harmony people. It's not that hard. 

Random Headline of the week

Teen accused of making porn with dog

To which I say, what is this world coming to??

My Dutchie found a home!

My beautiful Dutchie found her furever home! This is always a happy yet bittersweet time when this happens. 

a. It's happy because she's found a home where she will be loved forever and will never have to know what it is like to be at the end of chain eating off of the ground again.

b. I'm sad because I was beginning to really fall in love with my giant princess. 

One of, if not the only, pitfalls to fostering I suppose. Other than that it is something I don't think I will ever give up. (Although ask me in a couple years when I have a two-legged kid running around...) Seeing the pure, unbridled joy of Dutchess running around with her new fur-brother in her fabulous backyard and giant house (I wanted them to adopt me too) brought tears to my eyes. When we went back to the big green Element, we could hear her whining for us. Needless to say DH had to take a few seconds to console me as I drove home with tears in my eyes. 

But for all the heartache that fostering gives me, nothing can compare to the feeling of helping a scared furry munch-kin to find their new road in life and never have to worry about pain or loneliness again. That is the greatest gift that I can ever ask for. 

Now for the next one....

One Big Shepherd

That describes Dutchess in a nutshell. 94 pounds of pure German Shepherd/Golden Retriever love. She is all love. If I had a bigger house with a bigger yard she would totally be mine for keeps. Alas it's not to be. Cody has finally decided to give her the time of day. He's such a snot sometimes. I blame his Daddy. Dutchie spent her entire five years on a chain outside so she's learning all kinds of new things. It's really interesting to work with a dog who really has never seen even the most basic of things before. Dog beds were by far the best invention ever in her opinion. Fences were new, raised water dishes, human beds, doorways. She still hasn't quite caught on that doors only open one way. She still waits on the hinge end for the back door to open. Gets hit every time. We spent an hour and 2 slices of cheese trying to teach her about stairs. She made it down 4 of them! That was quite an achievement. Cody just looked at her like, "what is your deal? This is the easiest way to score cheese ever!" We're having a lot of fun with her and learning a lot. It's kind of cool to be able to open a dog's eyes like that and teach her that everything is ok. Although nerve-wracking in a way I suppose. She had her first bath yesterday (boy did she need it), the groomer said she did great! She smells a ton better too, although they sprayed her with a lemonade scented perfume which was a tad funky. Really, lemonade? Who's idea was that? All in all Dutchie is doing great. Now we just need to find her a furever home. Any takers?? :)

PETA's kill rates soar...

PETA does it again. If you give your money to PETA, be sure you know what it is NOT doing. 

Click here for a scary illustration of how many house pets they kill each year. I'll give you a hint...it's 90% of the animals they take in. People for Ethical Treatment of Animals my butt. Try Proud of Euthanizing Tons of Animals instead. 

Stand loud and stand proud and support your local no-kill rescue instead. 

Want more info? Click here or here

Weather.com and I arelikethis

Lately I've been feeling like I should get a job at weather.com. Why? It's storm season here in the MN and that means that weather.com is now my homepage at work. We have had thunderstorms the last 5 days here. This means that the H house has all been getting MUCH less sleep than is normal. My life revolves around storm forecasts. All social plans are made with the caveat that if a storm crops up I have to cancel. Which basically makes me as popular as the guy who picks up roadkill. When thunderstorms hit Cody turns into a giant shaking slobbering mess who crawls around on the floor following your feet. The weird thing is that he used to not care a lick, then last year we were on vacation and he was by himself when a HUGE thunderstorm with tornadoes hit the area. Ever since then me and weather.com have been best friends. I am now one of those people that obsessively checks the weather and when it's overcast I stare out the window outside my office praying for it to hold off until I get home. Last weekend a storm with golf ball sized hail hit our house when I was at my other job and I got home three hours after it ended to a bathtub crammed full of dog. All of Sunday I was never without a dog at my side. Ever. We're finally putting that memory behind us three days later. Thank God. So until MN stops getting storms (yeah right) weather.com and I will just have to continue our illicit love affair. 

Doggy weekend

Pics from this weekend...

Surveying his mighty domain

There's a new girl in town!

Who's pretty??

This weekend was pretty ridiculously busy. DH was out of town, I had to work both Sat and Sun at the second job and to top it all off there was a gianormous thunderstorm here which Cody thought was just fabulous. Things with Dutchess are going ok.....but only time will tell. Right now the AC is broken (awesome)  so I have two extremely hot and uncomfortable dogs and 1 hot and uncomfortable husband on my hands.